For my start in politics (which I have been carefully planning) I have landed a covetted position on the Soda Pop Board of America, 1515 W. Hart Ave. Chicago, Illinois.
"For a better start in life start cola earlier! How soon is too soon? According to the SPBA, not soon enough. Laboratory tests over the last few years have proven that babies who start drinking soda during that early formative period have a much higher chance of gaining acceptance and "fitting in" during those awkward pre-teen and teen years. Do yourself a favor. Start them on a strict regimen of sodas and other sugary carbonated beverages right now, for a lifetime of garaunteed happiness."
Ari Wallach (TEAM HUMAN)
7 months ago