All is right with the world: the self-righteous have dollar-billed their way to the top, the free-market is triumphant! And we the poor are even more rich in spirit. Like Dem Bums from Brooklyn for all those years, I awake with a tussled 'stache and a steely-eyed, non-stop believement (patent pending) that "we'll get 'em next year." I feel very, very sorry for Yankees fans the world over. It must be tough living in that characterless and sideburnless environment. Yankees fans can be analogized to two siblings, a boy and a girl, raised by a celebrated military man who employs his successful battlefield tactics to home life as well. The boy buys in completely, sure that discipline and tough love are what's best for him because you do not question your commanding officer. He will never rebel because he reaps the rewards of being second in line to this nuclear patriarchy. The tradition of Yankee Blue. He believes in birthrights and so does his sister, spoiled, gorgeous but not beautiful, obnoxious to the world yet celebrated by her clan, herpes then inbreeding. The Yankees are the baseball embodiment of that button-down plastic fantastic Madison Avenue scene, the military-industrial complex, 2.5 children, weedin' out commies as the one's who can't afford to buy a cap. To be clear, it's not really about the money. In baseball, the front office must do anything they can, within the rules, to win, and one way to do that is to throw money at the problem, but I do not begrudge them that. Their big money aquisitions did not beat us. It was homegrown Yankees Jeter, Rivera, and Pettite, that insufferable Johnny Damon, and somber Matsui who got the job done. And for my two cents it was Brad Lidge's blown ninth inning tie in Game 4 that was the crucial loss for the good guys. We were not clutch at the plate (save for CHOOCH) and so they beat us. Still, I wouldn't trade any one of our guys for one of theirs. We win as a team and now we lose as a team, our team, the team I love, that I can not wait to see at Spring Training. But I do love to chew on sour grapes and now I have that oppurtunity. So, in the words of the immortal Tanner Boyle, "Hey Yankees... you can take your apology and your trophy and shove 'em straight up your ass!"
The Headies (2007-present) Tit Patrol (2005-present) Endless Mike Jambox (2002-2007) Power of IV (1998-2002) Ninja Attak (1995-1998)
Best Team: Philadelphia Phillies Best Bands: The Ramones, Plow United, MC5, The Stooges, New York Dolls, Chuck Berry, The Heartbreakers, The Queers, Screeching Weasel, The Vindictives, Mr. T Experience Best Region: Mid-Atlantic Political Party: Great Ape Society
March 6 @ the Mason Jar - 1901 Harrison Ave. Claymont, DE 19809 - The Headies w/Disco Machine Gun, Lowdown, and Misanthropy - All Ages, $5 goes to Save the Spot!!
March 12 @ New Jersey TBA
March 13 @ the Riff, 1615 Main Street, Port Jefferson, NY - Benefit Show for Long Island Pit Rescue - Tit Patrol w/Hands Like Feet, Fellow Project, the Broosevelts, Critical Condition, Mailbox Baseball, the Young Leaves, Yesterdays's Heroes, Devil Sits Shotgun, The Scutches, Zombie Culture, Canons, Hooliganism, This'll Kill Ya, Common Enemy, Disclosure, Brace Face, Strong Arm Law - 2pm, $10, All Ages
March 14 @ the Mason Jar, 1901 Harrison Avenue, Claymont, DE, 19809 - Tit Patrol w/Disclosure, Ba-Durr!, and TBA - 1pm, Donations Go To Touring Bands, All Ages
March 14 @ the Cube16 Marrows Road, Newark Delaware 19713 - Hot Toddy and the Wilmington Wastoids!! w/Belly Dancers!
March 15 @ 198 Madison, Newark, DE - Tit Patrol w/One Short Fall, Disclosure, Brace Face, Holy Dirt, and Ba-Durr! - 4pm, Donations Go To Touring Bands, All Ages
March 19-21 Tit Patrol Recording @ Second Story Sound w/the Mad Splatter
May 14 @ Rugger's Pub, 40 South 22nd Street, Pittsburgh, PA, 15203 - Tit Patrol w/TBA
May 15 @ Cedar's Lounge, 23 N. Hazel Stree, Youngstown, Ohio 44503 - Tit Patrol w/Johnie 3 - 8pm
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